What this is all about...

A quarter life crisis is a real thing. I know this because myself, and my best girlfriends, are going through it right now. This blog is dedicated to the day to day banalities/craziness of those quarter life crises. For those of you with questions, the qlc is when you realize that you have to be Responsible. It is when the job you accept is the beginning of a Career Path. It is when the guy/girl you date might be The One. It is when you get pushed out of the nest and you have to flap your wings enough to cushion the fall. Perhaps your thirties are when you get to fly?
The question isn't who is going to let me; 
it's who is going to stop me.
-Ayn Rand

Monday, October 11, 2010

“Being 24 and Single…SUCKS!” Marisa’s QLC



If you are a girl I guarantee you will identify with some part of this story. If you are a guy, feel free to comment on what might be going on here!

Marisa moved back here after a two year post-grad hiatus from the Midwest. During that time she had one great relationship and one typical get-back-with-an-ex-rebound relationship. She is now back on the market and enjoying all the pitfalls of dating guys in their early twenties. Here is a short recap of last weekend in her dating life. I changed some details to protect the guy's identity, although I really don’t know why I bothered.

This weekend everyone (except me because I had to work!) went to Madison for Homecoming. The girls had a great day tailgating and headed out to the bars at night. They went to Mondays, a notorious drunk bar, where Paige and Marisa played the “yes, no” game. This is when one person picks a random guy at the bar and based on appearance you have to decide if you would hook up with him or not. To make a long story short, the one guy Marisa did say “yes” about ended up hitting on her five minutes later and then following her around for the rest of the night. Unfortunately, Mr. Yes wasn’t that great once they started talking and she made it quite clear, several times in fact, that they were staying with a friend and leaving early. Here I have to insert her version because she phrased it wonderfully:
I realize when you meet people at bars there is an obvious motive involved, so I tried to make it clear that yes, they're invited to follow us to another bar, and to Qdoba, and to sit on a Abe Lincon’s lap...but I'm just not that into you. He tried to hold my hand at one point, and I blatantly let go. Sometimes I would just walk away from him. Regardless, they followed us to get food when the bars closed, followed us up Bascom Hill and hoisted us up onto Abe’s lap, and even took pictures for us … When that was done, we were at the halfway point between their car and where we were staying. So we obviously had to part ways. I felt bad that we brought them so far from their car, but we had given them plenty of opportunities to split off.  I was flattered, thinking "Wow, this guy must really like me if he's following us all over hell like this when he knows he's not getting any.” Like I said, the guy wasn't really a catch, but seemed nice enough that if we were in the same city, I'd consider hanging out again. We exchanged phone numbers and when I got home, I sent him a text that said, "Thanks for helping us climb onto Abe.  Let me know if you ever come down here to visit!" His response? (brace yourself for this one):

"Of course.  I love hanging out with cock teases!  Maybe next weekend you can follow me around for two hours and then go home alone."

Ok, back to my recap. Did anyone else NOT SEE THAT COMING?! I sat there speechless, mouth agape when I heard that. Of course Marisa was upset – she had made it abundantly clear that nothing was going to happen that night. It was the twenty something question…If you talk to a guy in a bar, is he going to think that you want to sleep with him? Boys, sometimes we just want to talk! And to all those guys who aren’t thinking that – there are a few jerks out there totally ruining it for you. I do think that it is one thing when girls completely use guys to buy them drinks; it doesn’t justify them thinking they get to sleep with them, but it does put the idea in mind that maybe they will get something in return for that money they are spending. But just talking? Spending time with someone? When did that become a silent agreement to become something more than friends?

A note to the guys out there: what happened to meeting a girl and asking for her number? I find it completely refreshing when a guy goes about getting to know me in that (is it old fashioned?) way. I can tell you that my single girlfriends would go on a date with a guy who was respectful and politely asked to see them again over those who creeped on them all night. If you want to buy a girl a drink then go ahead and offer, but do so knowing that there won’t be a sexual return on that $7. Again, to those guys who are not like these jerks Marisa and Paige met this weekend – I am sorry you have to make up for all they do wrong. I asked Marisa if she was going to go out this weekend and she said she was afraid anyone she met would just assume she wanted him. I feel the same way being new in my city – how do you know the good ones from the bad ones?

Marisa didn’t take the evil text too much to heart. Here’s the end of this weekend’s story:
On the bright side, I requested more information from DeVry University for him.  According to Paige, this means he will get 2 phone calls per day from them for the next few months, encouraging him to go back to school. I guess DeVry employees are nothing if not persistent. I hope he has a decent cell phone plan!


If you have thoughts on this topic, let us know! To my international girlfriends, do you have the same trouble with your guys? 

1 comment:

  1. 1) I LOVE the DeVry bit! 2) I am convinced it is the age of entitlement. (Most) Guys think they are entitled to whatever they can get their grubby little hands on. And apparently guys are also more thick-headed and don't get that not EVERY girl wants them or thinks they are as hot as they think they are.

    My two cents :)
    jack

    ReplyDelete